Everyone goes to Facebook when it comes to sharing their exciting news – like an engagement, a wedding, a new house, or a brand new baby. Or they use it to ask for prayers for someone who is sick or dying. FB is used to announce many different life events.
I chose to use this platform so I could reach more of my family and friends in one place. I’m sure some of them will squint their eyes, remove any extra specks, and then realize they did read it right – sue is gay.
When you finally get to the place where you’re able to share a truth in your own life, you type it in a status on Facebook and then watch your private messages pile up with thoughts from concerned friends. Apparently your status on their news-feed disrupts their normal flow of things.
“Why did you have to come out on Facebook? I’m saying it’s a slippery slope with a lot of people to be influenced by your actions. That puts a lot of responsibility on your shoulders. It’s not something I can agree with, or believe it’s right to publicize.” (A concerned friend)
And that was just one friend. But I agree, I have a lot of people who may be influenced by my actions, as I’ve been involved with children’s ministry for over 30 years. What I hope is that they see a woman who loves God with her whole heart, wanting to please Him as much as possible, but who is also not perfect and will make mistakes; and will continue to be authentic, to help others.
What were the results you were hoping to gain by this announcement?
People need to know that I came out because it the right thing for me to do. I’ve always wanted integrity in my life, but for years I was lying to myself, to my family and friends and most importantly, to God. Accepting myself as being gay was not an easy task. It took years of self-hate and abuse. When I finally realized that God loves me unconditionally, I gave myself permission to love me, too.
I wish I could explain the peace that fell over me when I could finally say the words out loud – I am gay! It was like feeling a sigh of relief when your plane has landed without having any problems. At that moment I started questioning why I didn’t come out sooner. Why did I suffer for all those years when I didn’t have to? Why didn’t someone tell me that God loves me just the way I am?
That answer would be easy. I haven’t let many people in – really in – to get to know me. I was hiding for years, and so it was easier to stay hidden. But God whispered in my ears one day, to help bridge the gap between gays and the church. And to do that, I needed to be honest with myself, and with Him.
How can we help others who come out?
I’ve noticed others starting to peek out of the doors, feeling comfortable and safe enough to stand in their truth. I’m glad I finally gave up worrying about what others thought of me. The only one that counts is God Himself. There are still others that are just waiting for someone to hold their hand, and say it’s going to be okay. They need people to remind them that God does love them no matter what. We need to get the conversations started – and so that’s why I came out on FaceBook. To serve God in this capacity. Perhaps you’ll join in the conversations.
After coming out, I knew that part of my story needed to be shared in a book, along with ways to love others who identified as gay Christians. So I wrote my first e-Book 5 Simple Ways to Love Gay Christians That You Need to Know You can receive it free when you subscribe to my website. Every 4-6 weeks, you’ll receive a newsletter full of news worthy to share.
I look forward to engaging with you in the comment section below. Perhaps you know another simple way to love others. Please share your ideas with me.